If You Can't Beat 'Em, Enjoin 'Em

Some people have a hard time ridding themselves of parasites. Hook worms are notoriously hard to purge from the body. But with enough time and money they can be taught to dance, swim through hoops, play pinochle, and perform other sea monkey like tricks. However, just because a microscopic creature can be trained, doesn't mean it can be taken anywhere. Recently a certain printer magnate went to the beach and was appalled to find out what his hook worm was wearing. He chastised him thusly:

• "No Speedo, tame nematode." —Epson.

Those readers who happen to know the true etymology of Epson, please shut up.